Some funny complaint letters have become world famous. Here, is a collection of my favorites. Please send me your suggestions for other complaint letters to be added to the collection. Just use the ‘Contact Dear Customer Relations’ page to get in touch and paste your letter into the email or add a link to the wall on the Dear Customer Relations Facebook page by following the link in the sidebar.
A complaint letter to one of the UK’s very worst hotel operators, complimenting them on the tasteless decor, the non-existent maintenance, the mould and bodily fluid stains…. oh, and the frilly smoke detectors!
This remarkable complaint letter is probably the most widely read complaint of all time. Addressed to Sir Richard Branson, it tells the sorry tale of the culinary disasters on a flight from Mumbai to Heathrow. Hysterically funny.
All Mr. W from Derby wanted was a piece of pipe to fix the leak under his sink. A truly hilarious rant to the inept DIY chain featuring a dandruff eating hobbit and a twat by the name of Ken.
A complaint letter that all PMT sufferers (and husbands of PMT sufferers) will relate to, this is a rant about the message on the self-adhesive strip on a panty pad. Yes, really, and it’s brilliant!
A lengthy rant of a complaint letter to Nick Read, the CEO of Vodafone about being passed from pillar to post by the customer relations department. Long, but worth reading right to its very funny ending.
Another telecoms complaint. From the “Dear Cretins…” at the start to the “..May you rot in hell” at the end, this is a genuine Mr. Angry complaint letter. Some strong (but very funny) language.
Have you ever tried to get the local bobbies to deal with anti-social behaviour in your area? It isn’t easy. One citizen got fed up of being ignored and this is his complaint letter.
Ever hired a car that was a piece of junk? A complaint letter to a hire car company that should have tried harder. Reproduced with kind permission of Scary Duck, Alistair Coleman’s award winning blog.
Australia’s largest power company realised that it hasn’t billed John Noble for 18 months and decided it wanted its money. John wasn’t so keen to part with $1,900! Off went the complaint letter.
One of my own letters and the one that really started this whole crazy obsession with complaining. The letter is in the form of a draft magazine article sent to a famous health spa after a truly horrific and very expensive weekend.