The latest candidate for the Best Ever Complaint Letter, this rant by James Lockley to budget airline Ryanair is utterly brilliant!
This very long exchange with costume jewellery retailer Pandora was submitted by Stephen Crowley. The Pandora Saga is an epic tale, featuring wizards, elves, orcs, a turkey… and a baboon’s bottom.
You might want to put the kettle on before you read it…
“We didn’t realise that the ‘boarding’ that began to show on the boards in the airport approximately 1 hour before the scheduled departure time was Lithuanian for “Stand in a greenhouse for 40 minutes and sweat until you turn into a pair of balls in a puddle”.
Who could know that buying the wrong toilet paper could have such disastrous consequences? When Brian Legget’s wife accidentally picked up a pack of Charmin Basic, little did she realise that it would cost her her life.
Ian MacLeod wrote this latest funny complaint letter after his new mouthwash kept removing nasty gunk from his mouth, time after time after time… “Well, could YOU go to bed knowing your mouth was a biological chemical plant to rival any that Hans Blix never found in Iraq? I certainly couldn’t….”
A small gift for all Dear Customer Relations’ friends. A downloadable Instant Restaurant Complaint Letter. So, if get served a lousy meal or experience terrible service, you’re sorted!
There is nothing worse than being sat next to a morbidly obese person in an economy airline seat. Except perhaps being sat in an economy airline seat beside a morbidly obese person with serious personal hygiene issues!
Panic at Manchester City Football Club after a sultana is discovered lurking in City’s legendary Chicken Balti Pie. Urgent action is required before the entire football season is ruined.
Yet another complaint to an Australian telecoms giant. This time, it’s Kogan Technologies that are in the firing line in a letter featuring ice cream theft and an invitation to the movies…
My day job has meant that I’ve had to visit Glasgow rather a lot over the last year and because the eight hour round-trip drive and the ten hour round-trip train journey are both so mind-numbingly dull, I often resorted to taking the plane. Unfortunately, that meant flying with FlyBe…