Before I start posting new letters, I though it would be worth revisiting a few of the early ones. I wrote this one 9 years ago and ended up reading it to twelve million people on NPR Radio in the USA.
John Wines and his wife Julie planned a holiday of a lifetime – a safari trip to Africa. To make sure that everything went to plan, John booked his flights with the ‘World’s Favourite Airline’. That, it turned out, was a big mistake….
Yes, this is a complaint letter about tampons. So “Why is there a cuddly Labrador puppy?” I hear you say. That’s Andrex, not Tampax, right? Well, it’s not just any old Labrador, it’s Marley, and he’s in the letter
Steve Crowley recently witnessed his local Lidl store fining an elderly pensioner £90 for accidentally contravening their new parking restrictions. Steve thought that was disgraceful. If you agree, sign the petition to bring this odious practice to an end
Kevin Borgers had had a busy bank holiday weekend and then a storm kept him awake most of the night. When he eventually got to sleep, he was less than happy when war broke out in his cul de sac…
We all see plenty of No Parking signs but there weren’t any when comedian, Eugene Mirman parked his car in Portsmouth. He even paid the parking charge. So, he was less than pleased when he found a parking ticket on his windscreen after a stroll round the New Hampshire town. In fact, he was so displeased that he wrote a letter to the authorities, and took out a full page advert in the local guidebook to make sure that they read it…
When James Dean (yes, really) got an upgrade to the Upper Class Cabin for his Virgin Atlantic flight to New York, he thought his luck was in. Sadly for James, whilst he lost himself in the luxury, his suitcase got lost in the baggage handling area…
“I shook hands with a berber tribesman who’d been crossing the desert on a camel and sleeping rough for weeks and even HE was taken aback by the smell of my hand. “It’s the steering wheel!” I cried. “It’s not my fault!” An american tourist in Fez thought I was a vet. When I asked why, he said: “Your hand smells so bad I just assumed that it spent a lot of time deep inside pregnant cows.” “
It never ceases to amaze me how many complaint letters are generated by our experiences on airlines. Here is another one but unusually, this letter is not addressed to the airline, but to one of its passengers!
I have the gross misfortune of commuting along the M62 to Leeds. As if the costs of motoring were not high enough, the Highways Agency’s attitude to routine maintenance leaves much to be desired. So much so that commuters’ cars are being damaged by the appalling condition of the motorway. Well, someone had to tell them….