Dear EasyJet Idiots…

The spectacularly inept personnel of the easyJet Customer Relations Department brightened my day recently when they sent me yet another reply to a complaint submitted in April 2010.  How refreshing to receive a reply some 26 months after the original complaint and especially so when it answered a question that was never asked in the first place.


The email below was apparently in reply to an email from my wife dated 20th June 2012 (which was never sent and only ever existed in the imaginatons of those wonderful cretins at easyJet).


Well, I couldn’t just ignore it could I?


Our Reference: 120620-008986
Booking Reference: EG8TW4G

29th June 2012


Dear Mrs. XXX,


Thank you for contacting us.


After checking our records, I can confirm that the amount of £355.42 has been returned to the card used in the booking reference – EG8TW4G on 24th of February 2010, therefore this amount has already left our account.


My would request you to contact your card company, if you have not received the amount. I will be more than happy to supply any details required by your card company to assist with your enquiry.


Apart from this booking reference, if you have any booking reference whose refund has not been processed please contact me with that booking reference details with the following details below:


•Booking reference number
•E-mail address used while booking
•Passenger name(s) (at least 2 if more than 2 passengers)
•Itinerary (route and date of either outbound or inbound)
•Mailing address
•Telephone/Fax number(s)


If you have made the booking via third party like travel agency or any other website, please provide me the below information:

•Booking reference number
•Name of travel agency
•Date of booking
•E-mail address used while booking
•Passenger name(s) (at least 2 if more than 2 passengers)
•Date(s) of travel (both dates if return booking)
•Mailing address
•Telephone/Fax number(s)


When you provide me with the information, I can assist you further.




easyJet Customer Services


And here is my reply:


To:  easyJet Customer Services


Date: 8th July 2012


Your Reference: 120620-008986
Easyjet Booking Reference: EG8TW4G


My Dearest easyJet Idiots,


What a pleasure it was to hear from you again after so long!  Your email to my wife in connection with the an incident that took place in February of 2010 was such a lovely surprise.


This is in fact the second time that your department has replied to an email that we didn’t send.  Its almost as if you could sense that I was missing you.  How very perceptive you easyJet people are!!


May also I thank you for your very kind offer to process a refund on other easyJet flights!  I must confess that I did not expect such kindness but I am not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.  Having only just returned from Barcelona on your flight U2 7208 with a school trip of 100 insufferable, pubescent, flu-infected maniacs, I certainly feel that I deserve it.


So, without further ado, here are a few recent flights that I have endured:


29.05.12   easyJet ref: EK4QTLV   Flight: U2 1831 MAN to AMS

30.05.12   easyJet ref: EK4QTLV   Flight: U2 1832 AMS to MAN

04.07.12  easyJet ref: EK87JGG    Flight: U2 7207   LPL to BCN

06.07.12  easyJet ref: EK87JGG    Flight: U2 7208   BCN to LPL


I very much look forward to receiving my refunds.


Thank you once again for your kindness.


Yours affectionately,



Curiously, this time, I didn’t get a reply!


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